and so it goes...

well it's a gray, cold january here in oregon and for me, it's been a series of highs and lows, both physical and emotional. after a great new years contra dancing party in west hartford, which is maybe the best way to start off the year, michael and i hit a couple more contra dances in greenfield mass before returning to our cold, western state.

the weather, for me, has never played much of a role in my mood, aside from the fact that i don't think of going outside to play if it's pouring rain, or even just raining a bit. this year, however, has proved to be slightly different. perhaps it's that i'm paying more attention to my mood, and someone i know who lives in portland oregon has kept mood journals over the years and notices a definite down-trend during the cold, dreary, wet, winter months. i've never done that, thinking that i would be bias towards myself, making myself think i was feeling gray even if i wasn't. but this year, i have had a series of days where i've asked myself if i'm feeling depressed. am i sad? am i feeling low because of events that have happened or just because there's no sunlight? hard to say, but sitting around thinking about it sometimes makes it worse. attitude is everything, they say, and i'm not going to let myself get down just because it's easy.

in sadder news, rachel's cat midnight died on monday. it was an extremely hard day for all of us, emotionally, because she showed up sunday night and the cat was having a hard time walking and not eating and hardly drinking anything. we knew the end was near, we just didn't know how long she had. and then rachel went to class on monday and on her drive back from portland, the cat coughed and seized a little bit, and then just stopped breathing. it was sad in that the cat had been with rachel since childhood, and was her home companion and friend. i felt sad not just because of the loss of life and a loved one, but because i realized what she represented to rachel - a piece of her life, gone forever. there was a lot of crying, periods of calm, followed by more sad thoughts and more crying. i had a headache after that for hours. we buried midnight under the light of the nearly-full moon, at almost midnight...and may she rest in peace in our hearts and minds as well.

in happier news, then, my friend shelley from san francisco came to visit on tuesday! she was en route to hawaii via seattle, but was in portland on a stopover and stayed for the night. we had a great time chatting, snacking, laughing, and generally talking a lot. during the day she was here, there was napping, sitting by the fire, drinking tea, going for a walk downtown, shopping at the co-op, and dinner with my friend emilie. the next day i drove shelley back to the airport, and we spent some time reading the comics and looking at the security line before she decided to head through. she got security scanned for making last minute arrangements, and apparently her sandal set off one of the security detectors. as far as i know right now she is in hawaii and in a happy place. she was just what i needed after monday's events.

however all that driving put me in a weird place, physically and mentally. i enjoyed it because i was able to listen to some of my old radio shows on tape, and laughed about how silly i was then, and how much fun it was to be on the radio. memories came flowing back and i was in a good frame of mind. when i got home, i realized the house was empty with michael gone to las vegas, so i called kirsten and paul who came over for dinner, guitar playing, looking at pictures, and snuggling with the kitties. when they left around 9, i thought it seemed early to be tired, but then i proceeded to fall fast asleep on the couch. vivid dreams of college homecomings and contra dancing and later on i was in possession of some special magical device that could protect my friends and i from hail the size of golfballs that also had razor blades on it. i just had to focus real hard on what i wanted to happen and it would. meanwhile there were bad guys abounding trying to hurt me for one reason or another, and there was just a lot going on so i was glad when the phone rang and i woke up.

a contra dance friend, dan, called today. he wanted to come and check our kitchen, which he is going to redo for us, to check on the location of the window and some cabinet and drawer specs. he had been to portland last night, at which time he had visited a museum with an exhibit about contra dancing. he picked up one of the promo cards and brought it back, and he showed it to me...and it was ME on the card! taken last january in new hampshire, i knew that there was someone taking pictures, and i knew that he was somewhat of an artist, this photographer. he had exhibits around the walls of the hall where we danced. anyway, i was shocked to see myself on the front of this card, promoting his gallery. while it is a cool photo - i'm in the ray of sunlight shooting through the one open window - i'm not making a very attractive face, and it appears i have a serious double chin going on. i shouldn't complain, i'm practically a star!

http://www.dougplummer.com/#/dance/At%20The%20Dance/7/

it's cold in the house. think i'll go sit by the fire. then it's on to big project, getting "my room" cleaned out a little and set up in a way that would make me feel like spending more time in there.

hope all is well for you all in blog world.